America’s current parenting culture has bred a generation of overly protective mothers who are filled with anxiety and self-doubt. Social media overwhelms us with endless stories of child predators, child abductors, and horrible accidents as a result of child neglect. As a result, moms today have become so-called “helicopter parents.”
I am guilty of it myself. I recently went on a family camping trip with another family. At 11 and 7, their children are a little older than my children who are 5 and 7. Their children were allowed to have free-range of the campground. The mother gave them walkie-talkies and allowed them to play until it was dinner. I was allowed to do this myself as a child. However when she suggested that I should do the same and allow my own kids to run free through the campground unsupervised, it did not sit well with me. I gave it some thought and eventually allowed my kids to ride their scooters to the park. As it turns out, they came back in one piece and actually loved the freedom they were afforded!!
Anyway, the point is that ever since the day I found out I was having my first child I have been ridden with anxiety and self-doubt just like millions of other mothers in America. The truth is, my children have it pretty good. I really have no reason to worry as much as I do. This culture of anxiety we have constructed, takes away from the real issues that mothers face. I worry whether my children are eating harmful chemicals that companies have snuck into their food. While many mothers struggle to feed their children regularly, or at all, let alone the horribly expensive organic, non-GMO, gluten free food that current mommy culture deems as the only food appropriate for child consumption. While I worry that my children will be kidnapped from the campground, other mothers have to leave their children home because they cant afford expensive childcare.
My children are never left alone because I have family who are around to help out when I need to go to class. My husband has a middle-class job that has afforded me the opportunity to go back to school and further my education. Unfortunately many mothers simply do not have the ability to make decisions that fit this perfect mother ideal. They have to work and that’s okay! Our children are more resilient than we give them credit for. Growing up, my mother was a single mom ho had to work all day and didn’t get home until 6:00pm and was too tired to cook healthy meals every night. Being the oldest, I took on much of the household responsibility and began babysitting my brothers at a young age. I was a so-called “latch-key” kid and the experience made me a more independent adult.
We have constructed an unattainable mother ideal that even the most fortunate woman cannot achieve; Stay at home mothers are criticized for staying home and working moms are criticized for working. These are privileged middle-class problems and more attention should be given to solving real problems women face. And instead of criticizing each other, as women we should be more supportive and less judgmental.
Motherhood From Scratch 